Sex And Pregnancy
Sex, the primal urge for intimacy.
I was discussing with a client and her partner during a private birth class how during birth we tap into our primal brain. Where there is no logic, there is no sense of time, there is just pure raw energy. There is no care for sounds made, for how we look or what is happening around us. All that exists is the moment you are in. The intensity is at its highest spiritually, physically and mentally. It is the unraveling to reveal the most primal you there is.
We then discussed ways that you can practice tapping into that part of yourself now before labor so that it isn’t feared. My sweet client says “ I don’t think there is a way that you can before labor?”
My answer to her was, “ yes, its SEX”
Notice what your body did in that moment you read that last sentence.
Was it tight? Surprise? Excitement? Shame? Judgment? Uncomfortable?
No matter what your body's initial reaction was, I want you to explore this with me for a moment.
Your feeling that blood rush, your body heat up , Your not thinking of much else other than the sensations your body is feeling. Time no longer makes any sense. The only thing that matters is your partner and you.
This is active labor. Your body is experiencing the same level of Oxytocin (hormone that is present during making love and responsible for contractions). Your body is heating up, blood is rushing, time no longer has any meaning, the only thing that exists are you and your partner, whoever is touching you, the sensations you are feeling , the sounds you are making.
Many times during this moment in labor birthers start to take off their clothes. Anything that is touching them seems to become an irritant if it doesn't need to be there. Sometimes they like touch and sometimes it is too much.
I've had moms literally rip their hospital gowns off and throw them. I've walked into a homebirth where a mom was fully dressed when I was there 1 hour prior and now fully naked on hands and knees making primal sounds.
IT IS THE SAME ENERGY!!!
“the way babies are made, is the same way they come out”
My point in talking about this is that birth is just as initimate as sex
And that you can access that same energy during love making. With yourself or with your partner. So practice allowing yourself to fully let go during sex during pregnancy!
This will allow you to be able to harness, and fully trust yourself to let go during those waves of labor!
The only way this can happen though is if it is something that you want to do. When having sex and your tense, it doesn’t feel great. So make sure that the way that you are approaching sex starts with you feeling fully turned on before any penetration takes place.
Side note: there are ways to get into this primal brain without any penetration. Incase there are contraindications where you are not medically able to during pregnancy such as
Water breaking, Cervical Cerclage , pain, or your provider has suggested not too.
Here are safe sex positions that you can try
Spooning
Doggy Style
Reverse Cowgirl
Pregnant person on top
Straddle using a chair - woman on top
At the edge of the bed - man standing
Standing/ leaning from behind
Sexual Intimacy is beautiful and it is natural. It is not shameful, you should not feel shame for wanting it AND/OR wanting it to be pleasurable. Why would our body be made the way it is , if it wasn’t supposed to be something we enjoyed doing ?
Allow yourself to be lost in the sensations. Allow yourself to fully receive. Notice your body's natural sensations of intensity and see if you can soften your body even more during those moments to receive more pleasure. Let yourself make noises, to be primal and untamed.
There is a documentary called Orgasmic Birth that you can rent for $6. It touches on this very topic and I highly recommend it ! You can access it here https://vimeo.com/ondemand/oben?gclid=CjwKCAjw3cSSBhBGEiwAVII0Z7jeI520sZZeroWilC6TjqFuTtjvrOJxd82zyAxfb9hgd2UinhoWWBoC82MQAvD_BwE
Thank you for being here friend!
Xo, Trista
